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 on: February 06, 2014, 01:43:46 AM 
Started by Breeze - Last post by Breeze
I've just lost purpose and heart . My daughter she gave me joy happiness love hope purpose its all gone now, days followed by nights turning into weeks months years has the pain gone away quite simply No it gets hidden tucked away and even that split second when I feel im ready to think of her my whole world turns upside again its such a tremendous unimaginable unthinkable hurt that my heart feels such utter sadness and loneliness everyday every single day I fed up with life im just getting to the point were I don't even wanna get up anymore I don't want to be this way I just don't have anything left I do often wish I could talk to someone anyone but I don't really have anyone people will say hi around town but thats my social interaction done should I walk the dog maybe a hi , its like feeling so sad so depressed and I honestly can't find hope I just don't know how to change things if thats even possible I often think maybe I could talk to my doctor then I try to imagine what I would say how I could explain my feelings and realize I just can't do that either I might be considered a total wackjob or how could someone understand believe that things are just that bad you don't wanna go on you really have just had enough of my life, and if I ever had the courage what could be done a pill maybe an antidepressant would that really make things better I just cant seem how. I cant think of what to do anymore everything seems pointless nothing will ever bring her back I will never hold her never smell her I hardly even use her name anymore saying it only brings the tears how I long for things to be over. I miss you every day amberlee you were my world you made me so happy your smile could fill my heart with love and pride aways and forever mummy ♥

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